the red white and blue

today one kid walked in the door and immediately yelled out,

"geez! im so confused, why were there so many flags on the way to school!?"

as i started to speak, and explain why...

literally in unision about 5 kids started singing:

"its flag day, flag day, gotta get down on flag day..."

i definintely just stood there in shock before i busted up laughing. and of course the song has since been stuck in my head since.

curse you rebecca black.
but, bless you glee for making this song socially exceptable...at least in my world....

read read read

i had to give my kids a bit of a lecture the other day, because they were not staying on task during literature circle time. so we had a lovely chat and after wards i asked if anyone had had any questions about that days assignment, or about literature circles in general.

one boy raised his hand as sayed "i have more of a comment that a question"

i told him to go ahead and say it

he responded with a concern look on his face then said "i have a bit of a problem, but i get a stomach ache when i read too much..."

literally everyone just stared at him for like 10 seconds and then busted up laughing.

i made him read 10 extra pages that day too.... haha

biebs

while out at recess the other day, I had to borrow one of the other teachers whistles because there wasn't going to be a bell and the kids needed to know when to come in. as i go to blow the whistle, there were a few girls right around me and i told them to plug their ears while i blew the whistle.

well, the whistle didnt work. i laughed really hard, and then said something to the effect of "ahhh dumb whistle doesnt work!"

well, this was a very bright purple whistle, and the response i got after apparently 'cursing' the whistle would only come from a 4th grade girl.

she proceeded to grab her face with a loud gasp, and said 

"respect the justin bieber whistle!!!! his favorite color is purple geez!!!"

oh goodness. i mean i will admit that i did know this...and i understand the bieber fever deal. but goodness. im so sorry!

imagine that!

middle of the spelling test, dead silent, and a kid yells out,

"um...miss ward? why do you have a ring on your toe?"

well...um because its a toe ring!

"what? i didnt know they made those! weird!"

clearly, best job in the world...

55 kids and a chicken

a couple weeks ago thats who was in my classroom. 55 kids and a chicken. one of my students brought in her new chicken to show the class, and we just happened to have 2nd grade buddies down at that time, so needless to say, it was an adventure...

well, after she walked around showing the chicken, i see a look of half terror, half amusement on one of my students faces (its hard to explain...) so i walk up to him and ask him if hes okay, and after pondering his statement he says:

"um yes, im ok. im just feeling a little guilty because i had chicken nuggets for dinner last night.."

awkward much?

i was taking a drink of water from my water bottle after recess, and a girl from a different 4th grade class, in a very sassy voice says:

"ya! you drink that water girlfriend!"

i honestly didnt know how to respond...

utah state history

growing up in idaho, has made teaching utah history...interesting. i basically learn it as i teach it, which is always a definite adventure. while talking about utah symbols, i asked if anyone knew what the utah state dance was. several looked at me with blank stares, and one kids, with a look of desperation on his face shouts out,

"oh please please tell me its the hokey pokey..."

sorry dude. its actually the square dance.

whats a motto?

i asked my kids this exact question and we discussed what a motto was and where people come up with them. i quickly asked some students what their mottos would be, and without a pause i get:

"grip it and rip it."

and

"don't die"

oh the wit and spunk...

crutches

one day, one of my kids comes hobbling in on crutches. i asked what was happened and she told the class that she may have torn her meniscus, and was going to the doctor that afternoon. the day went on, the kids helped her throughout the day, but nobody really said much.

several hours later, nothing had been mentioned and everyone went to recess. as i was out on recess duty, several girls come running up to me. one girl says

"miss ward, whats a meniscus?"

before i have time to answer, another girl shouts out

"oh i think i know! i bet its the spanish word for KNEE!"

oh the minds of children...

TMI

one day after a sunny lunch recess, my kids came in got drinks and we quickly got started reviewing for our science test.

as im sitting there asking questions, i call on one kid, and as he starts to answer, he clearly burps under his breath. instead of ignoring it, or excusing himself, he shouts out in horror:

"ahhh man! that hot dog literally just stays with ya! i'm sorry, but GEEZ!"

10 year olds are disgustingly hilarious

quack quack

4th grader from a different class runs up to me while i was on recess duty and just starts blabbing non stop!

then she starts telling me about this family of ducks that kept appearing in her neighborhood, but the mom kept leaving the baby ducklings.

well, apparently one baby duckling got hit by a car. and this girls comment was...

"i cant believe the mom left her babies. stupid duck, pretty sure she was a first time mom though..."